I'm not a religious person. But I do rock the OCD. And if I've learned nothing else, it's that the poor, unfortunate people who live with me, abide by an unspoken and thus far un documented code of conduct. Let's call it my list of commandments. They just sort of know that mom will die a little inside if they rumple the rug while they're wrestling.
I know it's weird. I didn't ask for this calling, But this cross I bear is mine and I'm have this sorta paying it forward.
It's not a major case of the OCD. I don't wash my hands a hundred times a day (though it seems like it), I don't count the number of steps from the front door to the car. And I'm not disparaging those who do. OCD is a serious affliction. But I can make fun of myself and Bolderdash! that's what Ima do.
The following are my Ten Commandments of OCD brought straight to you from Moses, who didn't even have the good sense to wipe the Doodoo-rotomy off his sandals before he came in the front door.
1. Thou shalt not leave "things" lying about upon surfaces or coats and shoes on thy floor. *shudder*
2. Thou shalt not leave the tag on bath towels in full view.
3. Honor they tri-folded towel.
4. Keep holy the straightened cupboards and thusly, thy faced labels. Thy package labels are the only labels thou shalt leave in full view.
5. Thou shalt not have crooked picture frames.
6. Thou shalt have no false starts before me; you shall dutifully go ahead so that I may check the door several times to make sure it's properly closed, closed, closed and locked, locked, locked on Monday, January 7, in the year of Our Lord 2013. Closed. Locked. Closed. Locked. Closed....Locked...(closed. locked)
7. Keep checking thy appliances. If ye must go back in the house to check, then so be it.
8. Thou shalt keep things straight. In a line. Perfectly.
9. Thou shalt not covet thy neighbor's germs.
10. Thou shalt wash my feet. Then wash them again. Then wash them again.
...Then wash them again...
For God's sake, wipe your feet before you
track all that water in the house.